Lucia, the toddler.

Hey guys!

(Nanners:) It's only been a million years since I last posted. This is banana talking. Lu pants will chime in soon. Here's what you've missed. Lulu is a friggin toddler. She's got sass and major class. She's a little too good to be hanging out with a banana like me. Needless to say, I miss the bug. Girlfriend doesn't even recognize me anymore. For reals. Today, Lu monster had her one year cumpleanos. I'm honored I made the cut ;)... had the time of my life.

Ok, I'm gonna let Lu take the mic and narrate the pictures from today:

(Lulu:) Sup, homies! It's been forevs. Anyways, I had a bomb summer. I was mostly naked. I skipped the whole crawling thing and went straight to walking. Obvs, these gams were made for running. Mama and I go for runs like a couple times a week. Today, I had my birthday party. One of muchos to come. I let banana come because I thought she should see all she's been missing. I'm mad at her when I remember who she actually is. We were totally compradres and then she just bailed. But really, as much as I give her the cold shoulder, I love her deep down. I will always remember our meditation seshes, major nap times and yoga parties. 

Check out my fun party today: 

Mama made me an amazing cake. I think it was the first time I had serious sugar. It was incredible. 

It started off dainty. One finger at a time. It's probably the most delicate I've ever been in my existence. 

Then I said, screw this. I LOVE CAKE! It was a little hard to breath with all that cake in my nose but that wasn't stopping me from digging in. 

Then this happened. But grandpa was there to save the day. 

The mess was beyond wet wipes so mama just dunked me in the tub. Perfsies time to stretch the legs. 

Mama even got me lady bug balloons! How cute is that?!

Oh and my on-again-off-again bf Hudson came in to see me. I decided I need to keep my options open. After all he is younger than me. He's got some more life to live before he reaches my maturity level.

I'm not really sure who taught me this one, but it's fun. 

Me and Hudsy unwinding from the rager. 

Oh and here's a video from cake time:

Alright friends. That's all we got today. Me and banana miss you and love you tons!

Love,

Lu pants & Nana Banana 

Day 41: Ciao Bella!

Hi guys! Lu here. Can you believe it?! 41 blissful days together with my Nans. I can't believe how quick the time has passed. A few hiccups along the way but we glided through this nanny thing like we owned it and even though my attention span is very short and I will likely not remember any of this, I'm glad I will be able to look back when I'm older and see how much fun we had.

Here is a video compilation of the last week....

Oh and one more thing...

Grading papers is exhausting Mom! I tried to help out while you were at work. I didn't get far.

Ok everybody,  me and Banana send you a big kiss. Thanks for letting us share the journey. Now off to summer and spending every minute with my amazing family. Oh, but don't worry. Me and Nans are totes gonna chill often.

Love,

Lady Lu and Nana Banana

Day 37: This is How We Party

Ya'll wanna know how we get down in the Wright household? Check it out:

Prayer scarves, 3rd eye rubs, Bon Iver, meditations. Banana knows how to treat us right. Even lunatic Archie is a zen master.

Namaste,
Yogi-lu

Day 36: Reunited and it feels so goooood

Banana is back! She wouldn't stop kissing me all day. I thought my cheeks would fall off! We went for a little walk to the park. Look how pretty I am...

Here's a video banana took. 

She's on crack though. I didn't see her for 3 days, not 4.

Love,

Lady Lu

Day 31-32: 2 Mommies

Hey lovers,

Just wanted to share a few images of me and my 2 mommies. We all wore earthy colors. Momma & Nomma (nanny momma) even wore matching buns. Matchskies! I'm working on my bun. This is a pic with Archie- butt stealing the show. 

 I don't think I receive enough love. What do you think?

Oh and this is from today. Nana put me down next to her on the couch while she wrote an email. I was playing with her spiritual scarf. I love that scarf because it not only smells spiritual but I like the vibrations I get from it. She clicked send and turned to me to see me passed out. Am I the only baby that turns into a dead fish right before I fall asleep? Banana loves it when I get like this. Like a deep meditative state.

The folded towel is because I am always working out so I need to stay prepped at all stages of the day to make sure my sweat is taken care of.

Love,
Lu Lady

Day 29,30: Artista

Hey ya'll,

How'd your weekend go? Mine was awesome. I had a BBQ at my house on Saturday. Lots of my friends came over including Banana. We drank margaritas, ate some delicious hors d'oruvres  (fancy), & just sat around and caught up on our busy lives.

My favorite part of the evening was when Dadda programed Ariela's phone assistant Siri to call her "bitch." We were all laughing so loud.

Here's a pic at the end of the night when we were super sleepy. We are starting to do family cuddle puddles. So fun:

So today me and Nana did this awesome art project. I'm going to take you through the steps:

Step 1: find a cute baby (that would be me)

 Step 2: Get her naked and jump on the opportunity to do a nude photo shoot:

 Step 3-55: Get a piece of linen and non-toxic paint and print those cute little feet onto the fabric

 Step 56: Let the baby get dirty... even if it means her turning into another race. Mom always wanted a more ethnic baby.

 Step 57: framed and finished.

So in reality this project should take like 10 minutes and it was more like 2 hours. Since Nana was making a mess we both ended up in our chonies within 15 minutes. Oh and yes, I do have 8 toes on my left foot. Just more reasons to love me.

Love
La Lu

Day 28: Memory Lane

Today me and Ar walked down memory lane. Look how little I was!!! I still had those bedroom eyes though. I must have been a few days old. Brand new. I'm way more mature now and Ariela is way more unkempt although Im pretty sure she was hung over in this picture. It's so hard to tell with her. 

Oh and here are some pictures showing you the abuse I received from my own mother and future nanny:

 They were measuring how deep my fat was.

I wasn't too thrilled.

Look at me now:

Those were my modeling photos.

**Update: I still don't have a neck but that can be my thing, you know? I'll be known as the baby model with no neck.

Love,
La Lu

Day 26 & 27: Refreshed

Good afternoooooon everybody,

I just arose from a 2 hour snoozer. Hello world!

Love
Lulu

Day 25: Banana & Bug Time

So if you haven't already heard, I projectile pooped for Dadda today. He was so excited to share that moment with me. He's lucky it didn't hit him in the face. 

Banana came in today. Her frizzy hair and beat up face makes this video so special. She doesn't even try anymore with me. It's so sad. Just focus on my beauty and you'll be fine.

I'm gonna miss this beezy next year but now that I know she is leaving, I am going to kick it into high gear. Can't wait to show her how I really like to party.

Love Love,
The Lu Lu

Day 22: He Loves Me

Guess who I had a romantic day with?..... Huuuuuudsonnn. Mmm, his name just rolls off my tongue like butta.

Watch our initial meeting today. Hudson had just woken up from a nap and I? I was struck by cupid's arrow:

Our date started off by napping. We needed to get some good rest in if we were going to get some lovin in later. Hudson got to nap with mom:

I, on the other hand, got my own diva space in the stroller. Do you like my leopard pants? I wore them just for him.

I lent H-dog my hat because I didn't want to get his beautiful head burnt. Doesn't he look studly? A little fem, I know but he can rock anything and still look like my little lumber jack:

When we both awoke, we got romantic on a blanket. One thing I like to do to Hudson to show him my love is cover his mouth and nose at the same time so he can stop breathing. It's so cute. And yes, I am wearing MC Hammer pants. You can't touch this:

Then we sat in our matching bumbos which make us blobs look more human-like. I was like, "Babe, your feet are so big. You know what they say." And Hudson was like, "Yea, true story."

Hudson was like, "Hey Lu babe, I got you this red rose." I was like, "Baaa-aaaaabbeee! You're the best! Now what do I do with it?" He was like, "Hmmmm?"

As Hudson continued to ponder what to do with it, I decided to snap it in half. Seemed only logical.

 He loves me. He loves me not... HE LOVES ME!

We're back on track guys. Our romance will stand the test of time. Well, at least till our next nap.


Love you baby cakes! Till we meet again ;)
Lulu cakes  <3

And Dad, before you ruin this moment, I KNOW I'm not supposed to be on the lawn but it was the perfect setting for the date. Also, I did some pruning. I'm pretty good at that. I'm like mega-pruner.

Days 19-21: Updates

Hey ya'll,

So I've been a bit absent from the blogesphere. Have you noticed? Well, you should. A few things to update you on...

My eyebrows are getting nicely defined, don't you think? Makes for easier angry expressions which I am getting really good at:

Friday was an interesting day. Nana Banana came over for our play date. As some of you may know, I'm not quite keen yet on the whole "roll over thing" but I'm sitting up like a champ and my core is like a cement block.

Anywho, I woke up from a beautifully restful nap and was feeling awesome. Banana was trying to put me down somewhere because she needed to pee, but I'm like, "girl, you're supposed to do those things when I'm resting. It's me time now, beezy." I didn't want to be put down anywhere. She obvsies didn't listen to me so she put me on the couch in the TV room so she could talk to me while she was tinkling. Weirdo, I know. I asked her if she just wanted to borrow one of my diapers but she was like, no way. Her problem. Nobody puts baby in the corner so I jumped off. Well, I think it was more of a roll off. Since I am quite top heavy (my head is larger than the rest of my body) the way down was pretty quick. Bam, landed on my back. Not my best moment, but Ariela needed to be taught a lesson. Pay attention to me AT ALL TIMES. Thankfully the room is carpeted so my divine body landed smoothly on the ground and by smoothly, I mean hard. I cried for a minute. Ariela cried for an hour. Geesh this girl is a wreck!

So that happened.

I haven't been too happy with her since so I give her looks like these so she knows I will never forget what she did to me:

They work like a charm.

Also, I told me parents that I need to start wearing eco friendly products. First step, organic diapers. My skin is like butter and sometimes it tastes like it too. Would you want to put some stiff fabric on my buttery skin... I didn't think so.

Anyways, stay tuned tomorrow for my date with my main man, Hudson! Woot!
Love
Lulu pants

Day 18: Profound Thursday

Sup. Today was a profound day. Besides the fact that Banana showed up late to see me (she's such a bone-head), I got to do some spiritual reading and work on my voice patterns.

My business coach has me reading all about the power of TED. There is a "drama triangle." In this triangle you have a victim, rescuer and persecutor. Have you guys heard of the "empowerment dynamic?" It's some serious stuff. Here, I am getting myself acquainted with the "victim orientation."

After some heavy reading (I got through about 2 pages), I decided I needed to lighten up the mood. Outfit change! Leopard pants and party with the bunny! I also decided to wear a low cut shirt. Have you all noticed my forearms are getting really big. I'm starting to look like Popeye.

I am also working on my voice inflections. My voice coach told me to play with different noise patterns. Here was a little clip of it. It got exhausting. 

Love,
Lulu

Day 17: I Don't Like the Cat

Archie sucks.

Luc

Day 15: A Date With One of my Men

Hey all! Happy Monday!

Today, one of my boyfriends, Hudson, came over. We met through our moms and we clicked instantly. I'm a little older than he is but he's super mature for his age so it works out just fine. This is a little bit of how it went down today:

 Hudson was being such a baby. I was like, "Hey Hudson, it's me Lucia. Remember, your girlfriend?"

 Hudson was like, "Lucia, leave me alone. I'm sleeping. Can't you see?"

 I'm like, "Hudson, but don't you see how big I've gotten? I even rolled up my sleeves so you could catch a glimpse of my sexy forearms."
A little later once he FINALLY woke up...

 Hudson: "Hey Lucia. Thanks for letting me play in your at-home-gym. I can definitely see how your physique has gotten so defined. Also, I think I'm more into your nanny, Ariela. She's more my speed."

 I said, "Shutup Hudson. You need to like me. Ariela is old and used up. I'm young and hip."

 So we tried to reconnect. I played with his ears because he once told me he liked it but I guess things have changed. I was like, "Babe, don't you see how tight my clothes are? I wore them special for you today." And Hudson was like, "Baby cakes, you are crazy. I think a little too wild for me. Why are you making cat noises?" Ughhh he's so frustrating. But I get it. He's playing hard to get. I know that game.

That was freaking exhausting. I'm over it. Hudson, babe, you gotta learn how to let down your hair a little. Hudson was like, "Ok Lucia, whatever, let's just lay here for a minute. I'm exhausted."

What a guy. Anyways rough patches are normal in relationships. I'll call him next Monday and see if he wants to hang again. It's a rule in my dating bible that I wait a week to call back a guy. Keep them hooked, you know?

Love,
Lady Lu